A Message from James

November 4, 2017
A Message from James

It has been almost a month since my fiancé, James, passed away. I found a video of him that I had recorded only a few months before he died, in which I had asked him an important question.

We were in the car, and as he was driving I asked him, “if you were about to die, what’s the one message you would leave the world with? What is pertinent that everybody knows?”

After a second of silence, he answered: “Be nice to each other. Love.”

It’s weird when I look back at this video now. I was asking myself the question of, “what message would I leave the world with if I was going to die?”

And then, in that instant, I realized that I was going to die. I will die. I just acted like I would die later - someday, one day, way out in the future. But what if I started living my message NOW? Because really, we never know when our time is. And so I asked James - not knowing that he would pass away suddenly only three months later.

And I think people would have guessed his answer to be different. Something about living a mission-driven life, maybe.

But underneath all of that, his answer was something that - if it weren’t there first - would make a mission impossible anyway.

Be nice to each other. Love.

It seems almost too simple, doesn’t it? But when you get real with yourself… How hard do you make it to love?
To be nice to each other? Sometimes we make it way too damn hard.

I now have so much gratitude that I recorded this. I almost can’t believe that I did. One more beautiful memory I have of you, James. Loving you.